Farm Wisdom

Hick [hik] A person who puts a standard shifter nob on a automatic transmission ( commonly seen on Grand Pre's, Buick's, and Mini-Vans) . See also: wannabe. Habitat range: Midwest, though can be found in most suburban centers, common identifying characteristics ( see above) : "You can take a hick out of the trailer park, but you can't take the trailer park out of the hick" as well as a southern accent that has the ability to appear and disappear, at whim.

Dr. Uncommon Sense: " One postulates that they (Hick's) admire the Redneck. They seek to emulate the toughness and extreme regionalism eschewed by the Redneck. One theory suggests they are compensating for something, possibly a decided lack of personality. Though a lack of intelligence has also been sighted in numerous cases."

Dedicated to the Lambda girl I and a friend rode with to a service project. I believe there were two GPS units ( one in the dash and another was the kind that mounts on the window). We got lost. However, my friend made the correct guess that road we past ( twice) was the road we were looking for. But locals are more trustworthy than a GPS unit. So we had to stop and ask directions, Twice. Then we got a call from someone who'd made it to the service project. He told us the road my friend ( and the GPS) had suggested was the right one. We finally arrived. Not saying it wasn't interesting, or that I don't have a highly developed enjoyment of driving random places ( I blame this on my father, and random Saturday morning road trips). As well as the fact that the two of them ( Lambda girl and my friend) have wildly divergent idea's as to what constitutes good music and so the dial of the radio changed almost as often as it does when me and my sister drive somewhere together. Not to mention the Lambda girl was a wealth of information of clubs and local bars ( irony makes me happy). But having experienced the real redneck on occasion, and for a portion of my childhood driven to school with the "real" item, I can categorically say She was not "it". A funny story: Her outrage at the suggestion my friend hadn't gone to church last Sunday ( misplaced because he had) far outmatched her outrage at random males who asked her to dance, and then tried to grind ( which ,to her credit, she enforced her personal no fly zone). She was fun, and an interesting study in Midwestern psychology, but not the real thing. She was pretty, and not a bimbo. But since she felt males were attracted to the redneck "bimbo girl" thing, she played the part. quote from Fool's Gold ( good movie, watch it):
"Stall for time."
"I need you to act like a bimbo."