Relationships

Ok so i was taking a look at my schedule the past week. Thursday i went to Refuge with her, Friday we went to sweeny todd, Saturday we had the thing at my former directors house, and this afternoon, because both our rides would be staying afterwards we went to church together at the college church. Its almost as if a higher power is pushing the two of us together. Problem is which higher power? Thats go me scarred in a mildly academic sort of way. This relationship could mean the difference between me going elsewhere or staying. Hmmm...need to pray.

Well ladies and gents the rest of the story

I may be hooked, or if i'm not, i soon will be. I'm not sure. Not sure if i want to be, not sure if i can be, not sure about much of anything. she's a nice girl. But the unknowns are realy getting to me. I'm a missions major. She's not. She lives in California, what happens in the summer? I cant afford to date right now, at least not in the traditional sense. Not sure what to do. Realy starting to bug me. I like her, a lot. Time brent, you have it. You have a whole year. Maybe four years hear, no need to rush anything. Breath take your time.

Smashing success

Cant say i realy got any deets on the girl ( thats details for the uninitiated) but we had fun and it was a good low key event. We watched a boring episode of CSI then we headed out in the middle ( it was realy boring ) and headed back to the dorms. Not exactly the most gripping of events but i think we're both more comfortable with each other now, she may not be as enthused with the Brent as she once was ( i didnt use any of the priviledges one has on stage as someone elses husband offstage), but thats ok. It was fun just being social, and i had fun despite the boringness of it all. tommorow should be interesting.

Ok here i go, saints preserve me

I was invited to go to this devotional thing we have in the forum. This is cool, i'd been missing my normal devo because of play practice. Problem is is that said invitation was given by mrs. s. Problem number two is that this is more or less a realy great opertunity to get to know her, in a mildly spiritual manner. Its not exactly church, but close. It would be realy great for whatever budding ( and right now i'm speaking in the strictist terms of friendship) relationship we may develop. Problem three tommorow i'm going to see sweeney todd with the theater nerds. She's going to. Ok so we ( maybe) spending tommorow night in each others company. I'd like to get a mildy spiritual setting in before i go for the strictly fun. This could be dangerous, but so be it. If only there was saint for stupid people.

My blog may no longer be secure from the outside world

So rage has this theory about girls ( check out the coments below). He takes coments and links it to his facebook acount. This doesnt mean that they can get at my blog. Wouldnt be all that hard for her ( her here being Mrs. S)to go to his page then come here. I may be royaly screwed, or just have some serious patching up to do ( he may have also made her mad, which doesnt bug me so much, in fact it may not bug me at all). I like her, but i'd realy like to get to know her. some people dont talk about themselves very much. Hmmm...well feeling hungery and in need of a shower.

Several Dilemas for y'all to ponder

You know its going to be a good post when i use the word dillema ( and alternate spelling). If only i knew what that word meant...Well here they are in there shining glory. Now some of you out there may have be or have been freshman girls. So i have a hypothetical situation to put to you . Need some advice. Ok so up to this play the girls i met, you could converse with ( the guru) or insult ( Martha) without ever worring about anything beyond that. Here is the problem Mrs. S and i have had several conversations. And getting inteligent conversation out of her is like ummm....ummm.... drawing blood with fishhooks. Granted this may be some sort of backlash from the fact that the first month or so of my former romantic relationship, if PR got more than a monosylibic anser out of me she was lucky. This whole thing feels very highschool. Poking? it was funny the first time, maybe the second time, but it got old say after the fiftyth time. I mean is this just normal freshman girl, i cant beleave i'm in college? Its getting old, i barely now her and it seems we spend an inordinate amount of the very little time we spend together flirting like highschoolers, try anything else and conversation shuts down. Perhaps Mrs. S you and i may not be made for each other. hmmm....thoughts?
Ok i had a second dilema. Oh yes now i remember. Now the guru is on facebook. I'm on facebook. Do i invite the guru to be a friend? Hmmm...here are my musings. First i never talk to the guru seems kind of lame to invite her to be a friend when i never talk to her. Granted just about every body has a bazzillion people on thier friends list, but she also seems to be like the type that doesnt do the whole only online relationship thing. I would have moral qualms insinutating myself into the email comunity of someone who doesnt particualary like that sort of thing. Well have other stuff to do. Not realy. Just no more dilemas.

Homecoming

This is the first time Brent shall be actualy voting. Not of course for any off the guys becuase i dont know any of them, but i know a couple of the girls ( notably Mrs. Standfield, hot backstage make up chick, and a girl from the last play who's charecter i cant remeber). Kind of excited. Havent ever made my voice heard before and all that ( or it could be my large cappucino that i'm drinking).Well i have spanish ( or lame games) to go do... Oh hey, i'm going to see Sweeney Todd with Alpha Psi Omega. Ok so they are theater geeks, but the play looks interesting ( its a dark comedy about a demon Barber that kills people and his grilfriend bakes them in pies). Want to see a real play anyway. should give me some tips for my own acting.

Worlds shortest practtice

Worlds most inexperienced director. So she's a senoir, and probably hasnt done this before. Thats ok, still it would be nice to have a more experienced director. Hopefullly she'll get better. Right now we're in the chorography part of the play ( which doesnt especialy make sense cause we dont have props yet). That is entrances, exits all that stuff. Guess its alittle differnt from the secret garden becuase we have more people on stage. Not so happy with the fluidity of the practices though, but we have to have the kids out of there by sevenish so we have to skip to the scenes there in. Have this charecter thing i have to do ( what does our charecter like and all that) not so pleased. I have a couple charecters, and i sort of got them figured out, once I have the lines memorized i'll do all that. Supose its more text book and all that, important stuff for me to learn, but not sure i like it.

Just got done writting a book reveiw

My teacher isnt going to like it. well, not to be mean, screw him! He's a winer, and a bitter winer at that. A man who prides himself on thinking outside of the box, except for the fact that he doesnt actualy think outside the box, just parrot what a lot of seminary types write in books. The man needs to get his head out of his books ( or his butt) get off his butt, and relise to normal people he's talking French. Here's some weird teacher-isms for your afternoon enjoyment: lived christian experience, or if you prefer lived christian experience of christian spirituality. He actualy gave us a handout to read to explain what lived christian experience is, but needless to say i'm still confused. Well have some reading to do for the aforesaid class so must go do that ( eat and get money as well).
PS Any one know what a rule of life is?

Betting

Ok so Rage says he owes me five bucks. I'm like, what for? then my sister makes the coment that i bet five bucks that she'd be dating someone ( paraphrase she read rages coment on facebook). So i made a bet did i? personaly i'd forgotten all about it. But, ladies and gentlemen ( not sure there are any girls that read this blog besides mel and maybe her roomie) five bucks is five bucks. Tell me, my wise friends, would you consider me a cruel and heartless person if i said i have varoius amounts waggered on the lenght persons i know maraiges will last? Is this bad? Personaly it cracks me up. Not that i can do anything to win my money, so i dont think its that bad. No doubt a sign of the times. Granted if both me and Rage are wrong there is absolutly no financel loss to either party. How about life spans? Like famous figures? Old famous figures? Hmmm...is definatly a moral conundrum.

The second podcast

sucked. the third one will be out friday ( its much better). Its rather long, listening to it right now, and the beganing isnt bad. But its long. Go to this link listen to as much as you can stand and make some coments ( need sugestions realy badly).
http://brothersmerrill.ebrandon.net/

My posting habbits

Generaly i post quite a bit. that is an understatement. However there is patern. someweeks i will post every 6 seconds and some weeks if you get two posts out of me a day your lucky. Is the love afair over? What love afair? Unless you are refering to the fact that i told you i had a crush on the girl playing Mrs. S, i'm not sure if i can help you. Do i have a crush on her anymore? No, perhaps not. Havent realy thought on it all that much. Crush's come and go with such frequency i generaly dont do much about them, in fact you could say they amuse me. The human heart is at best a fickle beast. But i would stress that this was never ( to my knowledge) a two person thing. It was just me. Being the smart ( devilishly handsome, and uber nice as well) person i am i did nothing relizing said affections could jepordize the whole production. How? Like what if we broke up in the middle of the thing? We'd still have to go to practice together and that might be unpleasent to say the least. Well have some other emails to read ( and write).

My breakfast

So Martha ( the person who played her) hadnt slept all night ( how can you stay up all night talking online?) and so she was in a goofy loud mood ( how this varies from normal is yet to be determined). So she calls the brent over to her table and we hold a mildly random and weird conversation untill the worst freshman guy ever, joins us. Loud obnoxious and weird beyond all measure. Not to say his type wasnt expected but still dont like him. Wasnt as bad as it could have been. sometimes ( rather randomly) i enjoy company when i eat. It was good to see Martha again. We had a lot of fun with the play, and i think if there were two charecters/people ( in acting some times its hard to tell the difernce) that got close it was us ( in a friendship sort of way). Miss that sometimes. While this present play cast may be more normal, not sure they have the goofyness its takes to leave everything on the stage as it were. Random sidenote have dry skin ( windy oklahoma doesnt help) so am wearing shaving balm stuff evan when i didnt shave ( the roomie and mel will be horrified).

Does this make any sense to y'all?

The world _ especially the Western United States, the Mediterranean region and Brazil _ will likely suffer more extended droughts, heavy rainfalls and longer heat waves over the next century because of global warming, a new study forecasts.

Seems mildly contradictory to me. Heaveir rain falls, but more drought? somthin's not conecting here...Personaly, i'm scared of climate change. Think we need to be more green just becuase i think its a good idea. Seems to me that twenty or thirty years of research of actualy noting down what the temperature is, cant tell if the climate is actualy changing. Who nows is may be natural. ( like the ice ages and all that). seems like a lot of the stuff about climate change is a bunch of bull envented to get me to think the way this or that advocate/wacko/congress person wants me to, not atual science.

Facebook : my love hate relatioship

So i was doing some spanish ( no more rush to finsih half of the assignment before the test for me). Got bored ( realy? who'd a thunk it?). found some people on facebook. Kinda cool kinda not. I feel mildy stockerish looking up people ( hold on a minute going to check out some people who were in the secret garden) i barely know. very. perhaps we shant do that again. i'd add them to my friends list, but i dont ever speak to them ( generaly they speak to me, and its hi, then we pass going our seperate directions). Yet i it would realy give me an ego spike if i had like twenty bazillion people on my friends list. Perhaps not. Perhaps i shall go add a link to monster energy. Perhaps i shall go buy some more keebler elfin cracker things ( realy their just animal crakers shapped like elves).

Oc soccer sucks almost as bad as my people skills

So the guru is at the game. It takes me a few minutes to figure out that this blue clad figure is her. She nottices, i turn like a snake bitten brent. And she leaves. Once again my wonderfull people skills shine through.
Ok now for a rant. We cant pass, we cant trap, and we sure as heck cant shoot ( oh and we suck at defense to). It might have been the cold, i notticed none of the players were even wearing under armor, what they hey? So their from oklahoma, but check the weather dudes, at least wear a long sleaved t-shirt. I could have played a better game. They passed backwards! Instead of trapping they just sort of one tuched it...a nice pass to the other team. If we'd played solid soccer instead of this crap it wouldnt have taken until the last four minutes for us to be winning solidly. And then on defence , ok so the bad guy has the ball, you keep between him and the goal! Is that so hard. Goalie, that box is your little castle, no one comes in their with the ball and leaves walking ( unless he just sort of lets you have the ball then he lives not otherwise). Ok on to the offense. Trap, pass, trap, pass. And the good Lord gave you mouths, talk. talk.talk. Its important. You talk or you lose. I spent a year starting on the bench ( i went everywere) becuase i talked, i told the guy on the field who he had open and if a man was coming on. I was like a spotter in a nascar game. we took second place that year. thou must talk.

Kudos to the athletic chicks

Normally i am not such a big fan of the athletic wear. It does little or nothing to flatter the female figure. However, right now i am tired. Its cold ( relitivily). I am looking like a schlub. At these times i apreciate my fellow schlubs. People who are spiffed up ( like i was yesterday) deserve a kick in the mouth. Its friday, your in college, its almost as bad as being preppy on mondays. Well have some stupid games to play.

first practice is over

went well. These guys are much more normal than the last bunch. Did pretty well. Mrs. stanfield isnt as hot as one would like, but still atractive. Think i may have a crush ( thankfully i'm realy good at hidding these, i mean realy good, so good you'd never find out if i wasnt telling you). Well wait a week and things will be back to normal ( which is good long term wise all things considered, and there definatly are some considerations, but this is a good time for me to stop typing in parenthesis) . Luckily we wont have practice together for a while ( avoid her? jurys still out, havent seen her so far so shant be hard if i want to) well have some games to play.

First practice

Am curently instaled by one of the few plug ins so my laptop can charge, awaiting the faitfull 6 ocklock hour. six is a little early i must admit for practice, unless we get out earlyier which i would be all about, getting out at 9 would be awsome. Mrs. Stanfield is here early, good, means she's excited and or nervous, havent talked to the dame yet, should be an interesting experience. This practice should just be a read through, so should end quickly which would make me a very happy brent. well i'm bored going to go play an online game that requires no time comitment or brain power.

Relationships: a discusion with Brent

Ok so we were in my intro to ministry class and we were doing this examen thing ( part of being a hip preacher is to use big words no one knows what they mean) and as part of that we were asked if we had a "soul friend" . our hot missionary chick said that it was her boyfriend and that they were best friends first. made me wax nostalgic. Looking back on my one romantic relationship, i can now say that that was the time i miss the most. Back, way back when we were just friends life was so much easier ( we're sort of friends right now, granted i dont think either of us would go out of our way to ever see each other again). I miss that. I need some chum here at oc. I know some folks, have a couple friends, know someone who would work, maybe. Hmmm... Needed, moderatly atractive female. Interested in friendship that allows me to make fun of said person ( and vice versa), be moderatly open with spiritualy. Granted i know this guy that i may email and form some sort of guy group spiritual thing. If all else fails theres nath... nope, no there isnt (not a chance in a million years).

Several Conundrums

Ok first the funny one. I think i may have forgotten what the guru looks like. Not that i hadnt seen her ( our campus isnt that big) just i may have thought a differnt person was her ( brown haired, athletic types abound at OC) . I ran in to her ( almost litteraly) by the library on the way home from chapel ( i always forgett she is somewere in the proximity of the library after chapel, which for those of you who are yelling stocker, i have to pass the library on the way to my dorm from chaple for every day) . And it wasnt the person i'd been thinking it was. So for the record it might have been the first time she saw me before i saw her.
Second , there is something in the water. I wass feeling pretty dang spiffy so i decided to dress up. I was slumping in my chapel seat ( a weird girl i know might have been several rows in front of me and i didnt especialy want to say hi), and mel and the roomie walk by. Mel was usualy mel, but roomie was dressed to the nines. She'd done somethin' funky with her hair ( i beleave this is the first recorded time i've seen it differnt, wasnt bad) was all spiffified, and ( she claims she never wears them) had ear rings in. Methinks some poor unsuspecting male is about to be pounced upon ( do i know his name? yes, nice guy, kudos for being in kappa).
Need sleep.

The health and busness advantages ( not to mention spiritual) of being locked outside my dorm

So i'm stuck outside my dorm. I think no biggie, i'll go get the person at the desk to get me a code, pay my fifty sense, its over. An hour and a half latter a poweraid consumed, a bag of mini elf things ( gram crackers shapped like the keebler guy), fruit things that are suposed to contain 200% of my daily helping of Vitamin C ( two servings), and a bag off peanut m&m's, a good part of the begaining of Joshua, mathew 8,9, working on the begaining of daniel read one of the room mates walks into view. Ah the benifits of sitting outside my room, my butt slowly conforming to the tile floor. Lovely...must do it again some time.
Well, got some online stuff to do ( Brandon you need to check out free online games .com very cool)

Back From the student illumnus thing

Thought it was going to be some sort of retarded singles club that i'd go to once to apease the demons ( mels friend) and never go back. I was surprised, it wasnt anything like that. There were some moderatly inteligent people there, and they were actualy doing stuff. I may be back next week, if i'm bored, and remeber it and have a play practice schedule so i can commit to stuff.
Ok so i was in the caf. I see someone ( rage prepare yourself to not understand) whos usual dining time is 6 ( rules for the caf: 1. dont eat the shrimp. 2. dont eat anything in the black bowls. 3. never eat at 6 4. never eat at 5:30) and i think ok, so that meeting got out a little late. There's a clock on the wall but you guys know my ability to read the analog clock is somewere next to my ability to spell. Actualy i was to lazy to glance at the clock. It was round aboutish 5:50 when i hit the dorms. Soooooo... on wensdays it 5:20-30ish? hmmm... not like i'm going out of my way to avoid the said person ( anymore). Just well, its more convenient for me not to talk to anyone. Should i talk to people? yes i should. Do i? no i dont. Well have to check my email.

Moderatly hot chick is mrs. stanfield

Ok, so we score big! Hope she's nice. I've had it with these nice types that are brats

Facebook

Just schoomzed myself an acount. Pretty dang freakin' sweat. Was going to put an Rss feed to it, but decided i didnt want the whole world, or at least people i knew but didnt want to know knowing what i type in my blog, that and i'd have to spiff it up, and make it OC apropriate and all that. Not such a big fan of that. Not that my blog is obscene, but if i wanted to whine about my school i wouldnt want to do it were they could get at it so to speak. Think the girl who's playing the misses stainfield to my mister stanfield, as is Ben ( charecter from the last play) and some other actor types. Need to go to my directory and make sure its who i think it is. Could be hot chick, could be not so hot chick ( another reason why not to post this blog to facebook) Well will go away and then come back with the results.

so happy to be back

I'm back in my rythem people. Worked out this morning, ate at the normal time, went to class. I could do without the whole class thing but working out in the morning makes me a happy person. Very happy. Am about to go hit the costume shop to get measured for whatsoever i shall be wearing. Oh going to google my charecter, see if he's actualy a real person Dickons new.

I'm back ( and listening to Beethovens 9th symphony)

While downloading some surfing music ( the beach boys,and some other 70's beach types). Feelin' pretty good to be back in the old digs. The ferrit still hasnt emailed me, but whatever. Digging on my strawberry bannana slushy from sonic and a great burger. How was kansas? well mixed review realy. Trip there was fun, trip back was fun, inbetween...was differnt. I went because i was mel's brother and both of them, mel and rommie, would have felt bad leaving me behind. Not sure the family got that, compeletly. We may be going again at thanksgiving, so we'll see how that works out ( should be interesting at least). Not that there was any...ummm how shall i phrase this..anything more than, what i would put in the raised eyebrow, thats interesting (in that anoyingly sly tone that says ya right). Maybe i just dont know them well enough. Hope that was it. Not that roomie is in anyway unatractive. But the whole she's mels roomate thing, has her on a sort of older sister thing ( not completly but mostly). Relationship potential? that question lies solidly in that grey area that one travels in thought when pondering lifes persistant what ifs such as what if the caf served good food, what if Randy Johnson played for the Twins ( would they make it to the world series?) very speculative, and supremly more dangerous than my two moderatly bad examples. Moving on. Everybody learnin' how, everybody surfin' now ( got some blogs to read)

Friends family, people in general

I shall be gone for a whole four days. No posts for four days, no internet, no nothin'. Not sure i'm going to survive, but hopefully this hot chick i know ( sort off) will be on this trip so maybe b. merrill will have something to distract him. After this work thing gets done ( we'll be back sunday night) we'll be packing up the mules and heading to topeka. Goody. Beats the heck out of me cooking my own meals though. Shouldnt be that bad. Its somethin' to do. Got some mad memorizing to do ( and packing so i'll finish up real quick) so i have something to ocupy my non-doing stuff moments. got to go. Miss y'all. Realy i will.

I get the part

Brent Merrill is once again on the acting circuit. Very happy. Not sure just who it is i'm going to be playing ( know the name, but its the christmas carol were dickons tells the story and his friends act it out, so who'all i'm going to be playing not sure off. ) think i'll be the ghost of christmas past ( yes a hard one) , and bob cratchit ( also yes, hard but fun). I got a tough, feel good part. That is i'll have to act ( that is get out of my comfort zone on stage) but people will like me as well. Perhaps the next one i'll try for the bad guy. Either that or the main role ( as aposed to a partly main charecter) . Dont know, we'll see if i evan ever want to act again after this ( brent was pretty jaded after the last one, if it hadnt been for the cast party he'd never had acted again). It should be fun. I'm a low maintanence actor ( that is i'm used to coaching myself) but maybe just maybe the director will actualy help me, it'll be a learning experience at the least.

My alarm clock doesnt go off

Not that it usualy has to. I'm one of those weird people that after, say six weeks of waking up at the same time, will wake up thirty minutes to an hour before i need to, then doze off and wake up every ten minutes until i need to get up. So this morning i'm awake at 5:50 dose off, wake up , its 6. dose off, wake up its 7:10. Was realy pissed. Means i have to work out after chapel. Ah well, i'll get a good work out under my belt before my fall break trip, and if i'm in the gloomies for not getting a part ( stranger things have happened) i'll have an opiate for my soul. Wonder who works out after chapel? curious. Guessing security, the guys at the front desk, and this chick ( know her name from her id that she left face up in these cubby things we have in the gym, but none of you would know her) were all flipping out ( either that or they figured my fall break started early.) I've been there at 6:45-50 for the past six weeks. Well got some stuff to do.

I clean up, what part? not sure

First performance sucked. Second? bob cratchet here i come. Maybe, we'll see. Not sure. I'm going to go be insecure somewere for a little bit.

Two things

Ok y'all can now check out our first Podcast. By all means make some sugestions, we suck.
Second. I'm in trouble with the ferret ( a very nice person by the way to all you who dont know her). Made some coments about a former relationship. Best friends and all that. didnt like it. Not sure what i'd do if someone did that to matt. I supose it would depend on the stuff. And wether or not it was true. She wanted the article gone. Kinda feel like a smuck, but its my website. Dont feel so hot about it, we have become email friends, hope this doesnt kill the whole thing. Ah well. Some times you got to be tough, and it sucks. Made her the offer of publishing an article if she wanted it. we'll see, could be fun, could envolve to many monsters in my past. Note to the rest of y'all: any derogitory coments ( other than funny stuff) pointed in either her or PR's direction will bring the wrath of the Duck Cave Administrtor down on you. The criteria for funny? Purely subjective, wether i think its funny or not.

Uber Stardom Awaits The Brothers Merrill

Ladies and Gents i present to you the Brothers Merrill. Friday Me and Brandon will be doing some seirous podcasting. Should be fun. It'll have some stuff about WPA week, undoubtedly some serous takes on issue we care about ( maybe). Undoubtedly we have stardom in our future ( problem is my mike makes me sound like crap) . We did a prevuios one and i'll post a link when i get it from Brandon, its realy crappy, buts there's some mildy humurous stuff on it. Oh! just remembered a short work of "fiction" i published on ebrandon will get ya'll a link to that as well. Sleepy brent must go sleep now.

My uber intilect has sniffed out the person

Who is the angery poster? Its the Ferret. For refrence for those of you that know said person, it would be Brandons best friend in highschool was her eldest older brother. Sis the L. in your class used to work at olympia and is now married is her older brother. How do i know this? the ferret happens to be the only person i know that uses the word bro. Not sure why, but she does. Well, i have you pegged. Another mystery solved by the Great Detective Sherlock Brent.

My Beutiful day: my need for a mountain

With lots of trees. Perfurably the deciduos types so they'd be changing colors. Sigh...today would be an awesume day for a hike.Think i'd take a mountain over a babe ( this is a relative easey trade, becuase there are no babes in my life)whith a vested interest in removing me from my state of bacholerhood. Maybe. Perhaps i should just find a chick who digs hikeing. Oklafreakinhoma is flat as a pancake. Its the nicest day in the world. Just the right temperature. A light wind. You can litteraly smell Fall in the air. Want to be out doing something. Lazily tossing a football. Just walking somewere. Sitting isnt doing if for me right now. Ok i admit! it might have been the weather that had me down. So this may be the only day you get a nice brent. Shame, he's such agreat guy. Prediction is that tommorow Grizzly Bear Brent will stuff him in a sack and drown him in the river ( its suposed to be cloudy or rain the rest of the week). Well have to go read Dickons. The people hadnt checked the scripts back in but i'm guesing the books online somewere.

Quick Serious Article on OPEC

Will they cut? Fox doesnt think so. Rueturs and Bloomberg do though. Whose more informed? Your guess is as good as mine. Seems to me that the wonderful principles of capatalism should be on our side. You see Iran and Venezula are pissed because they cant produce enough oil. So they figure that if they cut the quotas of the bigger countries ( some of which are overproducing there quotas) it helps them, and reducing their quotas wont hurt them becuase their not producing as much as their suposed to be. However methinks the big countries, which are over producing, will go with the sneeky option of reducing actual production, this hits Iran and Venezula hard, but leaves the big guys who's quotas are still being exceeded, sitting pretty dam good. Will it happen? Dont know. Me hopes that the bajjillioneers in charge of the oil will be greedy enough to resist the urge to cut production with prices double what they were before. Dont have a car right now. But will next year. My personal opionion, lets do some regime change in Iran, Venuzuala, and privatize the market. Either that or nuke them all.

I make Callbacks

Yes! confident, happy, self assured in a very charming and manly way is back with us, you may even see me smilling ( a rare sight i'm told). Going to go to the library sometime and get the script and steel a march on my fellow actors. But first must get rid of some excess energy. Which means i'm going to run. Wise? No, i'll feel like crap tommorow, but i may break eight minutes. Its what i do when i'm happy. Other people tell their friends, i run ( probably becuase i dont have any close friends, and no one could stand me when i'm this happy) females of the world, watch out. Suave ( no not the shampoo), charming, hot, all around uber studly Brent will be with us today ( after my run and medicine ball workout, i think perhaps i need a life).

Two things

Call backs have been posted. Must do read list.
Opecs cutting production. cant say what i feel about that. but y'all can read my mind.

Policy on Anonymous Posts

Ok, so this is just a heads up, and may turn up to be just a product of my now very caffienated mind. Have a nick. Thats all i ask. I just want to be defrentiate betwixt the lot of you. You can be so very vague that i'll never in a thousand years figure out who you are ( however i warn you, i have a good rembrance for typed detail, and may or not be laying a trap for the two of you to see just whose you are). If you refuse, i'll find some sort of editorial means to disalow anonymous posts. I dont like pulling rank, but as god of The Duck Cave, it is within my means, rights, powers, to demand what i wish, and this is what i wish. For the record my curent ideas as to whom y'all are, are these: Nice poster: Mrs. Medlock, Ben, or the guru ( there's always a chance of it being someone i dont know, but dont think so). angery poster: PR, or someone i dont know at all. If i'm wrong please fell free to corect me ( no i will not be disapointed if you are on the wrong list, becuase i have my suspicoins of that as well). well hopefully you are feeling that my uber mind powers creep you out. The Muse.

The full, and complete ( mostly) thoughts ( warning i used spell check so i might have changed the wrong words, my spelling is that atrocious)

Ok, first and foremost, lets start at the very begaining. That would be girls. I like them. when i am not being a jerk, or tired, they seem to like me. I have a deep respect for girls. My job as a gentleman ( wether you like it or not) is to protect and respect and make girls feel special. Why? because their girls, may not make much sense and if its old fashioned, well dont care. I dont always acomplish it but i'm flawed, and i like to think i do a decent job of it. Moving on. Call it what you will, but every one out there has a list of what they want in theperson in there life. It can be subconscious, like people being attracted to blondes ( blondes....Cant get enough of 'em, problem is i've had pretty bad luck with blondes, that and for some reason its hard to find nice ones, go figure) . Or it can be an list people activism use, such as Brent will not date a non-christian. Have nothing against y'all, but I have some rather strongly held beliefs,I want the girl who eventually sings on for forever to share those with me. Sometimes we relise these things, sometimes we refuse to believe they exist. Me, I like to think i'm somewhere in between. I'm atracted to shy girls. But frankly I dont want one, at least not shy all the time ( by want one that would mean, I would probably not actively seek out a deep relationship with one, cold? Yes, my perogitive thank you very much). I want her to have some spunk, to be brave enough to get mad at me if i'm not treating her right or hack her off. One that demands I treat her like a lady. I mean to treat every girl that I meet like a lady, but I want someone who expects me to. High standards always bring the best out in us. I also want her to be intelligent. Pardon me folks, but ditz's make me laugh. even more so are those girls that try to pretend their dumb ( low self esteem and all that). I dont mind you not being Einstein, but no Paris Hiltons please. I also want her to be atractive. Is this really so much of a shock? I am frankly not an expert on girls, but i'm guessing they want a moderatly atractive male as well. Its nothing to be ashamed of, its just the way things are. What are my standards of atractiveness? Well first of, there are a few people that even though they may be called whatdoyoucallit plain ( rage, no coments from the peanut gallery) have such a personality that make them very atractive. Very few, but they are out there. On the other hand most really hot people have really sucky personalities. I want someone inbetween, uber nice, and cute. My standards not yours, laugh if you must.
OK time for some prediction revision. Methinks Brent will be alone this week. Thats Ok. Have some personality issues to work out ( that and some wonderfull emotional monsters to kill) before Brent is ready for that sort of thing. Would I be up for a low pressure excursion? Sure, why not. I enjoy feminine company in just about any situation, your guy's opinions generaly come from a different view point, and if nothing more make me think ( nice way of saying sometimes girls see stuff I dont and cause me to change my mind on stuff). Any sort of activity with someone non-related ( or quasi related for my buds in lambda, thats is would be fun, but if we actualy liked eachother would be kind of ackwerd) male or female would be fun. Right now I have a distinct need to chase something wrapped in leather and filled with air, but football sign ups were weeks ago. Wahhh!!! well my batteries almost dead so must preview and post before it dies. Oh one last thing. If I know you, and you want to use your real name or a nick i'll reconise dont worry about me being offended. I wont be. Its the internet, first of all cant say I take it that seriously, second if you want to say something, by all means say it to my face. Builds character and all that.

Swilling my sould in caffiene...

Ok first some kudos are in order. To whomever left my first angery coment, thank you. I enjoy the whole interaction thing going down, and if your angery at me, all the more so. Hope you wont stay mad, but your choice bro.
Ok time for a little daydreaming. I have been dreaming of snow. This of course no doubt comes from not being home to be able to see the fact that there is no snow, but ah well facts had never prevented me from daydreaming so foreweard the ranks. ( oh sorry almost forgot, i'm in the coffee shop, drinking their "high octane" brew) Three years from now, i hopefully will be in the final stages off...planing my trip to the slopes. Hopefully someweres in colorado. three years is thakfully distant enough that i can procrastinate for a couple years without any harm. It also alows me to gather the chums ( Matt, sis, brandon, jeremy, asorted friends), euipment ( helo ski swaps, i think i'd feel moderatly weird buying a snowboard at a ski swap but whatever), finding acomidations, a week maybe, a rustic cabin ( short for cheap, with big fireplace) , then off course the slopes, someweres famous in colorado. Great huh? yes i thought so as well. What are my far more devious short term plans? Well i happen to know ( not a whole lot, but i know the name) a person from said state. Right now i'm decideing as to wether or not i'm shallow enough to get to know someone for the express purpose of snow. Damm moral convicitions. right now off course its just a product of my overly imaginative mind on caffiene. Snow.... i'm afraid my friends ( and aquaitences) i may have to go elsewere before my moral convicitons totaly disapear. Oh! for you angery poster if your still out there and dont hate me forever, i may publish a more complete article on our dearest WPA week. If its a bit cold and logical, well sometimes my mind works that way, wich is funny becuase sometimes i can be the uber logic meister, and other times my logic makes people barf. Well must go...do...ummmm....something else.

Ok so i might have been fibbing about the old spanish homework

Need to do it some time tonight, or tommorow morning. Was waiting for the bro to podcast with me, but the chump was tired, not that thats all that bad, means i have something to do in the next couple days. Ok, so i'd better get started on that spanish homework. Maybe....

Drowning my pain, boredom, whatever in Dr. Pepper...

Healthy? No, goodness no. And since soda realy screws with my endurance, tommorows run ought to suck, but ya know, dont especialy care right now. Got some great music on, am sipping the forbiden juice of the soda machine, trying like heck not to be depressed, and you know what? Its working in a mildly sucky sort of way. Which for the record is ten times better than not working at all. Tommorow morning im going to be kicking myself in my rather fit arse for this, but tommorows tommorow ladys and gentlemen.
Ok so opertunity nocks but once. So i see a person ( wouldnt you all love to know what her names is wouldnt you? hehehehe a master never reveals all his secrets) walking towards her dorm at the same time i am rapidadly aproaching my turn in the sidewalk towards my dorm, i could have cought up with, chewed the cud with, and at least added her to my very small list of people i know and talk to ( this is slightly smaller than the list of people i know) . I would have enjoyed it, maybe made some strikes against my state of jerkdom. What do i do, i smile at myself and keep walking, perhaps a bit slower so said person doesnt nottice me. Brent , your incorrigible ( dictionary.com is a great resource if any of my big words stump y'all)

Happy sad news

First i will be happy then i will be sad. Granted i'm afraid i cant be very happy for very long. Well i'm out of stupid math forever.Never again, bro's.
Ok nuff happiness onto my uber sadness. I was contemplating WPA week, with the skill of a well known contemplator. I could go out try to be dashing and charming. Yes i could. I, ladies and gentlemen can be a girls dream come true when called upone. Problem, i dislike acting to gain some sort of human affection. Well, Mr. Brent what about pretending that your not evan interested isnt that acting? Kinda the reverse but still leaves me feeling like a smuck. You see, you might say i'm girl shy. My first ever "girlfriend" , well to put in nice terms, lied about some very important things, notably her affection for me. Granted i was also partyly guilty, but she still lied, and it still hurt, and in the end it is still her fault. Did i contribute? yes. Did she still have a choice? yes. I cant say i've ever realy delt with all that crap, not evan sure how to. But to make a long story short i' m scared spitless of ever getting that close again. At the same time theres a hole in me that she left, i need someone there. I could just go at it and hope that the feelings would eventualy catch up with me,they say some things just need doing and then you get the hang of it. I dont want to hurt someone though, i mean...Perhaps not the ideal first date experience. well i'll go mope over some spanish homework.

Am bored, think its time revise my predictions

Bored as heck. Decided in keeping with my depresso mode to modify my predictions. Grizzly Bear Brent is going to be spending his wpa week in much the same way, he has spent the past few weeks, bored as hell. Disapointed? Not sure. Cant say I expected much more than this. One has to be nice and friendly to get more than just attention for my uber hotness ( yes i just used uber to anoy you all). Shame realy, i'm a realy great person ( he said sarcasticly). Well awaiting an mildy important email so i can go watch a lame movie with my intro to ministry group.

I have found something to blame my grizzly bear fealing on

Ok, they call it post performance depression ( at least i think they do). Its what happens after big games, or actors giving a performance. Our focus ( wait a minute...who is they?) is no longer what it was ( i.e winning that big game or giving that steller performance). For actors i'd guess that ( someone should find out who they is...) its worse. We create a charecter that is unique, at least our interpritation ( and find out why "they" want me to be depressed...) of the charecter is, and then poof, that charecter doesnt matter anymore. Hot girls may randomly come up to you and say that your charecter was their favorite charecter, but you know thats only going to last about a week, so your still pretty bummed. Well enough phsycoanaylises, i need meat. Must go eat. Hey that rymes...

Thoughts

Interesting thought from my bible class. the guy was talking about the golden rule. He was talking about how he knew people that had never cursed him, or hurt him, or treated him badly, but they were the same people that had never hugged him, told him they loved him, of done anything nice for him. I beleave, Brent is in that catagorys. Not feeling so hot about myself right at the moment, which leads me to my second thought. Is it realy so terrible to play a role, that why'll it may be simple, everybody enjoy's, that they come away saying they liked my charecter? Is it so bad to play a likeable charecter that may not have a whole lot of depth but everyone likes? Perhaps not. I dont mind so much people liking the person i play evan if a third grader could have done just as well ( not that i didnt do a pretty dang good job with dickon) in the part and they wouldnt have notticed a differnce. Well, i may have another one of those charecters this time. But he's a lot more bubly, that is more excited about life, not quite so much nature boy, you know likeable but silent, more gregorious and loud, but fun. Well we'll see. Have to make it through the next couple days without chewing my nails to peaces. Baterys low.

Today is a solid Evanescenc day

Yes, the wonderfully erie sounds are ringing in my ears as we speak. Its raining, which is cool, becuase yesterday it was just sort of a miserable drizzle. Oh, must tell you all about my ego trip. The girl who played mary, finaly responded to my email that said she did realy good and realy should tryout sometime. I was compared to Johnny Depp by her father. You cant evan begain to imagine what that did for my ego. Johnny Depp is ( from the whole Two and a half movies of his i've seen) my favorite actors. No, no it is much more better! It is a picture of a key! Why is the rum always gone? Anyway, hopefully she'll get of her arse ( when typing in a british acent this is comical not crude) and go to tryouts tonight.

I clean up

Brent has a part. I will make call backs. Perhaps this is a bad sign, last time i didnt think i was going to make it, and i did, this time i think i am going to make it, and i wont. Who cares? i did great very psyced though tired is kicking in. Going to check out my pics now.

Pretty dang ( uber) sweet

Just updated my blog to some sort of beta version, a little freaked, beta usualy means we havent worked out the bugs yet but we're putting it out there anyway. Well going to do some checking out of its uber coolness ( hopefully)

Sucky day

OK so its probably my fault. If i had done my real run instead of wimpying out and doing one at half the speed i usualy do it would have been a better day. But i didnt so sucky day is here with us in the flesh ( note to rage: its a solid loud angery music day). I've been a sleepy grizzly bear with a soar tooth all day. My nap didnt do much to molify my demons. I just downed a glass of vannilla coke so that may kick in in a few minutes and we'll have happy brent. Thinking about our vending machine, they have coke. Coke=caffiene=happy brent. But i've already had more than i usualy have in my system and not being able to go to sleep tonight wouldnt help angery Brent out. Missing all those wonderfull four letter words i gave up. ( ya'll may not have notticed, but i havent sworn with any consistancy since, someweres mid summerish) They are calling to me. Saying say me brent, we'll make you happy. Yes you will, but i'm not going. Life sucks. Oh, got some pics from the play, i'll post them as soon as i actualy have them in my possession( brandon i may need you to put them on photo gallery so there published somewere on the web). Well Thinking about that vending machine. Got to go. Wish me luck, tryouts start in 20 minutes. Its been "cold" today. Want snow. Big heaping piles of it.

Ok, some thoughts

excited about auditions tonight( or tommorow night whichever). Here's what i want in whatever part i get ( if i get one). I want it to be bigger than my last part. If its the size or evan smaller i dont mind, but i'd like something that justifies my givivng up every weeknight but wensday and my long saturday morning workout. Not to mention my sunday nights. Second, want it to be a hard part. Dickon wasnt that hard. It was frustrating at first becuase he was so hard to understand, it wasnt like the writer spelled out what he was meant to be. but after i put two and two together ( the other charecters talk about him a lot) it wasnt that hard to play him. He was a nicer friendlier version of me when i was fourteen. Not so difficult. I want something that stretches my acting muscles. Something that people go away saying wow! i realy liked your charecter, not becuase he was number two of the total completely likeable charecters in the play, but becuase i have to work hard, and do an icredable ( this isnt vainity, i can do an icredable job, and have, its there, it just needs a realy tough part to bring it out) job, and there like your charecter blew us away. The director spent all of two seconds on Dickon, i wnat someone the Director has to help me sculpt, not that i mind doing all the charecter development myself, just i'd like a chalenge. Ok, well stupid online games are calling Brent.

The Bourne Ultimatum and James Bond

First Bond, becuase i realy care so much more and there is actualy some sort of information on it. first, james bond is not blond. Never has been, shouldnt ever be. Second, i read the book i was so pysced for this movie ( nov 17). It doesnt look anything like the book. Granted the book was a real as a James Bond book could be so it was kinda boring, and who wants to be boring? Well we'll see. If they screw it up i'll be mad, very mad.
Second the Bourne Ultimantum. I love the series. Its very cool. Its as real to life as a spy movie is going to get. The first two were realy good. I tried to read the books but they were all a bazillion pages long so no can do. Word on the street is that they only used the charecter not the story becuase it was to cold warish. Which means their going to be making it all up for the third one. Good, bad. Good because they did a pretty dang good job with the other two. Bad because they could realy screw up a great series.
Ok on to my mildy informed article on spying. Good material on said subject are CIA by Tom Clancy, Spy Dust and Master of Disguise by Tony Medez. Great books. The first one is a little dry, by Tony's ones are realy good. Spying my dears, unfortunatly does not envolve hot chicks, fast cars, and lots of explosions, unless you screw up. Then you may be an explosion. Its actualy a lot of boring stuff, like reading newspapers, watching the finacial markets and maybe taking pictures of a loose document now and then. Off course you have the intense stuff, like bugging peoples rooms, stealing computer files, and taking pictures of documents ( nottice i did not say steal, spy's do not steal things that will be missed, hense they take a lot of pictures), course if you've got a good source of humit ( human intel) you may have to work a dead drop. But its not like the cold war anymore when you used to go joging and some kgb guy would pop out of the coffee shop behind you and jog after you in his suit. There's still some dangerous places out there off course. I'm guessing its no fun to be a agent in sudan ( good book on that Chasing the Jackyl) , or iraq or afganistan. Its probably not that rough spying on our friends anymore, like russia, china might be a little bit tricky though. Well thats my serious post. Hope it was informative as well as interesting.

Physical education is such bull

Ok so i'm sitting in phys ed class as we speak. Its billed as the class thats suposed to make sure you dont gain those terrible freshman 15, funny thing the girl who's at the gym before me ( running) and is there when i leave ( stretching is sitting two rows over). This is bull. I spend more than six hours at the gym a week, and i usauly do something sunday evan if its nothing more than a couple pushups and a few reps with the medicine ball. The girl across from dearest brent probably spends way more time than i do. Why are we here? to what point and purpose? Sure its only once a week, but i could be drinking coffee right now ( think i got to much sleep over the weekend so i'm feeling tireder than normal), or blogging like mad, instead i'm stuck in stupid class for the next thrity minutes. Can you say pointlessness? i can. Oh my serious article is going to probably be something about the new james bond flick, and maybe something on the Bourne Ultimatum .

Worried little me...

Ok, first a little rant about how much i hate the news, then a little duck cave trivia then the reason i titled this the worried little me. Ok i hate the news. Realy just hate it. Why do i read it? well every once in awhile i find something that moderatly interest's me. My source for all things news? Fox. Why Fox you ask? well its like this, just about every news agency has an agenda, thing is every one else try's to hide it, Fox just lets every one know that there a bunch of conservitive nut jobs ( not that i myself am not a conservitive nut job at times, Limbuagh for president!). At least when i go to their website i know which way my news is going to be slanted. I dont have to guess. Fair and Balanced? thats a load of bull, but for the record i think they do a better job of it than the others do.
Time for some duck cave trivia. From now on, until i get bored, i'm going to try for a serious article on something that concerns and interests me on mondays,whensdays, fridays. We'll see how that goes. It might not go at all, You wouldnt beleave how hard it is to find something thats moderatly relavent to me in the news.
Worried little me. Catchy title is it not? Here's the low down. Someone, not sure who they are, posted a anonomous post on my WPA article that said here's hoping, i enjoy reading your blog. Ok, thats cool, i hope y'all like reading the stuff i write. But what the heck does here's hoping mean? ( if anyone would like to guess feel free to) Is it like a toast, here's to hoping? Or a vague form of Good Luck? or is it here is hoping in refrence to the postie ( whick would mean they'd be on campus and female) . This would be cool, but again the post is vauge. I may have made a grave tactical error by disclossing my thoughts. Ah well, i thought it would make for a good post, and another interesting post at the end of the week, kinda like football predictions. Well , spanish class is calling and i have to proof read this post so bon voyage!

The perfect girl, and my predictions for WPA week

Ok, so i'm stepping on dangerous ground right now, so i'll make use of a disclaimer. These are merely the musing's of the muse, and are purly theoretical, very shall we say, theoretical. they are part hope part vague idea of the curent feminine landscape. I will at the end publish a post that tells y'all what realy happened.
Ok, first the perfect girl. This perfect girl is very close to the perfect relationship. So i'll tell you about both but first the girl. first, must be inteligent. This is key.Luckily all the possibles seem to have a decent amount of inteligence. Second must be atractive, again a check mark for the triumvate ( what i call the three possible, though there's a forth maybe) . Third got lots of spunk, spirit, whatever. Not sure on one ( i know this one less than the guru) but she did spring sing so check mark. OK onto the perfect relationship. I'd like to think of it as a step above freinds but below dating. I want a relationship, but i dont particularly have the bling or the time, or the will to go with anything very comitted. I want someone i can walk with on pretty nights, and go to movies with, and talk with, but i'd like it to be very low key. I dont want to have to spend every meal with said person nor every free moment. NOT that i wouldnt want to, just dont want to have to. Privileges? Well, maybe holding hands, but nothing beyond that. My gentlemanly sense of honor gets in the way, but besides that, if i'm going to be mildly non-comital, i dont think it would be proper to go beyond holding hands, if that.
Ok, onto my predictions. My roster includes three possibles and one maybe. maybe being a step below possible. Truth be told, there's a couple among the possible's that could be switch into the maybe catagory. Warning! this list is a vey upbeat look at my prospects, so be warned, the only exciting event of this week may be my trying out for the Christmas Carol. There is always the possibility of someone i dont know at all poping into the equation becuase of the play, but dont know. Well thats all its going to be a good week.

Melancoly me.

Its over. Like realy realy over. Like we took down the set over. Think i'm going to cry. Brent will be there monday ( or tuesday) to try out. I cant say i particualry enjoyed it, but i liked it. It was fun interacting with the other people evan if they were weird. If i dont get a part i may work back stage. We'll see very tired. Must sleep before church.

Helo world! the play is over!

Gone done with, ka put, no more. Yes! tryouts for the next one are monday and tuesday. Am i going to be at them? well thats depends on the femine comunity. If Brents schedule is filled with hot chicks, i'm not evan going to glance at them. If not,i'll be there front and center monday night. Actors my friends are realy weird. But i like to act. I'll put up with them if it means i get to act. I'll also put up with them if it means i have something to do on week nights. Well have to go play some games i said i was never going to play again.

Pre-performance post

Once again the muse is musing. Tonight is the last performance! Yes! I no longer have to shave every day, yes! Tommorow marks the start of WPA! Yes! Ok so its going to be realy hard to focus. That is i realy dont want to do it tonight. Then we have cast party. Only excited if the stage directors are going , other wise i will be very tempted to skip. Ok so cant think of anything else to write. Oh! i have finaly reached the point were i can no longer play stupid internet games, they both anoy, and bore me.

Post performance

Well we did good, damm good. Real realy realy realy good. Met a couple girls ( actualy that was afterwords on the walk back) . Well need to go play some games.

The Intermission

Its been quite the interesting night. I think the crowd is drunk. They laughed at me saying Aye. Not that funnny. We almost missed an important line, and we cut out DR. Cravens intro. Its been the best and worst night. It was the worst of times and best of times.

The pre-play post

Coming live to you from Judd Theater, this is Brent, and We will be discusing the weird hot girl who is stage derector. Make that two. Ok, so we have some hot stage directors, Brent was a happy man. Last night in absense of a real makeup person to do my make up, Guess who volenteered to do my make up? You guesed it. I was pretty happy. There was some curious banter in which one of them mentioned the others boyfriend, but i figured it was spite and a little bit of rivelry and realy did not care, after all what can come from a Hey, do you need your make up done? Yes i do. We'll do it. So on my way over to hell ( Judd its freakin hot over here, they need to turn the airconditioners on) she's on the porch with company and a male i assume has some sort of romantic designs on her ( again its an asumption). She like, hey brent! i acknowledge her existance, she then asks me if i'm ready to have her put my make up on, ok here's the breakdown. Methinks it was a mix between hey everybody i do his makeup, look smoe i have other hot guys in my life get a move on, and spite, so i'm like sure, give her the thumbs up, and walk away with a Gee that was weird expression on my face. Not sure what the heck is up, but she's been moved from the cool hot girls catagory to, the weird hot girls catagory, its a pity to, she's hot.

Weird Al

Sucks. Need to find him and kill him. Everybody back here likes him. need to kill him. Ok having a "philisophical" debate must go.

Intermission

Should be done in forty minutes. Yay! it doesnt realy start till tonight anyway. Martha is parrot and she's saying I screwed my lines up but i saved my arse, can you say realy anoying. well got to go.

Wellcome to the first performance

Its first performance. Nervous? who me? Yes, very. I love this sort of nervousness, its like a high. I could run around the world ( twice) and not break out in a sweat. Ok so i'm here way early, but i shall survive ( they are curently playing weird Al music , am very tempted to play some good stuff realy loudly, but shall relise) . Every one is in a daze, i brent was up at 6:39 and worked out for an hour, and i'm like you guys are complaining about being up at 8:30, have a urge to punch some wussy actor types, but will resist the urge. Well must leave you before the realy weird people back here nottice this post, excuse the mispellings.

Godd news bad news

Next week is WPA. Bad news. I no longer have a good excuse not to go out. Happy and sad. I mean what if someone weird asks me? Granted, the possibilities of no one asking are pretty dang good, but you never know. Well if anyone needs me i'll be in the bomb shelter under my dormitory chewing my nails off. Not that i wouldnt mind some feminine companionship. Could use a pretty dang big helping of feminine companionship. What the heck, worrying's to much work, i'm going to play stupid online games now.

A poem for you

The Curse lyrics

Artist - Rigoletto Soundtrack

Album - Rigoletto

Lyrics - The Curse

We heard the tale since we were young,
Heard the songs that have been sung,
About an evil spell.

Someone beautiful is cursed
We feel sad through every verse
Til a kiss and all is well

The message that no one can teach
Is clearer to someone like me

There is no curse or evil spell
That's worse than one we give ourselves
There is no sorceror as cruel,
As the proud and angry fool.

And yet, we cry life isn't fair
Beneath our cries the truth is there

A power that will break the spell
We should know very well
Is locked within ourselves

Yet we'd rather blame,
And curse our faith and change
We run from everyone to hide from the pain
And all the shame

The story long we knew it well
About a wretched evil spell
A power that will break this curse
Oh I know all too well
Is locked within myself

Life Sucks

Ok so this is WPA week, dont ask me what it actualy stands for, but roughly translated its girls ask the guys out. Lovely, on the one week were i dont have to be outgoing or anything to pick up the chicks ( this of course would be assumming that any of them would have me, cant say i've been all that socialable), i have practice every night at 6. Arent i lucky? Well things may be looking up, thursday, friday, i should be free after 9. Doubt that it matters, undoubtedly i will be batchin' it out here in the old dorm room. Thats the problem with being atractive and shy ( insert lazy if you prefer). They like to look at you, but they'd never talk to you. Especialy when, because of your uber actor skills you can convince them you cant see past the book your reading. I supose the key to all this would be to change and be nice, and outgoing. Sounds like to much work to me.
Non related thought. I'm worried about the chick playing Mary. She was sick last week. Now she's in a daze. she's one of those girls that when you see them you want to protect from the big mean evil world. She seems like the kind college would hit kind of hard. Hope she's doing ok. I supose i could ask, but that would mean comunicating with the oposite sex. I cant take the pressure. Need to go to sleep.

Good things bad things

Ok, so we'll call her the babe. That will be the official very vague nick. She's a chick i think i've mentioned maybe once before, i'd go back and check to see if i had, but i blog like mad so i would have to wade through way to much material. Ok so update. She did freshman fanfair. Madly envious. It looked like a lot of fun. People just getting up on a stage and making complete fools of themselves. I could do that. If i had i wouldnt have to be practicing from 6 to hell freezing over, every day this week. Ah well. Anyway word on the street is that she digs the brent. Cool. If i get done with stupid math by the end of the week, the play will be over, i can get a job, have some cash ( that is enough to date) and i'll be set. Problem 1. Transfering once agian raises its head. There is a decent chance that i'll wont be here next year. Second not that interested in any sort of romantic entanglements, at least not right at the moment. But we'll see.

We have granola!

I have just discovered that my cafiteria actualy has granola! This is good. Problem, i have a sneaky suspicion that its way less healthy than my bran flakes. Numero Uno: i am always suspicious of a granola that tastes like it was soaked in honey. Very tasty, but well, methinks not as healthy as we could wish.
Ok other news and coments. The person was not at the gym this morning. This off course doesnt mean much, becuase it is a monday morning, and typically its not the day for early morning workouts. So we'll see, it would have helped to debunk my hypothesis, but i guess we'll just have to wait and see.
I hear voices. Not sure what they were saying, though, i didnt have my hearing aids in. I was walking over to the gym this morning, and i hear voices. They follow me, so i assume its someones walking behind me. I get to the gym door, do my spy-like check of my twenty, not a person in sight. Not good...

Friends, Romans, country men

Lend me your cynide pills. I'm still in practice. Its 10 fifteen i'm in the back of judd theater, and the only reason i can type is because i have the keys memorized its that dark. Not that i mind, i'm a creature of the dark, i enjoy it. That is so long as i can see the stars, or its a dimly lit back stage. Those bleak dark nights in the middle of winter when i use to have to take the trash out in the middle of the night used to scare the crap out of me. Ok so i might just not like dark when its freaky. Never mind you guys dont care. Well have to go read the constituency's blogs.